What a Difference Talk about a long time between posts (More on my Son part 36) It has been over 2 months since my last entry... WOW! Quite a while, well let me see what I can piece together and still try to keep it under a few pages. Not that it matters. I am not expecting a lot of readers or comments.. I am writing this for me probably more than for anyone else. Sometimes my stress level just seems to demand some sort of outlet, this is as good as any and probably better than most other options. Guess I will start with venting a little bit and then move into events and hopefully it will all come together in some decent order that can be followed by anyone who reads this. Part of me wants to scratch the part of the last entry nominating the teacher for sainthood, but then my Catholic guilt reminds me that she probably tried as hard as she could, I even remember at one thinking maybe we broke her (referring to her teaching spirit). I am sure she just got to a point where she could not take it anymore. On the advice of our advocate we did get our son into see a behavior specialist in early December, within a few weeks of the last IEP. After his visit the doctor prescribed a medication he felt my stem his aggressive behavior. I was against the medicine immediately. More truthfully, I was scared! Scared... of a couple of things: 1) For me: How much will it change him – I know his aggressive behavior is not acceptable in a school environment, but I do not want to chemically change him. He IS MY SON. I LOVE HIM FOR WHO HE IS PERIOD. 2) For Him: How will it change him? What will he think is going on? Will there rebound when the medicine wears off in the afternoon? Will this be a lifelong medication? Now here is where it gets a little more scary. I began researching the drug on line and while two independent studies were cited as showing a decrease in aggressive behavior in children with autism, no clear explanation was given as to how?. Are you thinking the same thing I am? Even after calling the drug information line for the manufacturer of the medicine. “You designed and then made the drug. How can you not have at least an idea of how it works do decrease the instances of aggressive behavior?” That conversation could be an entire entry on it's own. We decided to at least postpone trying the medication until he completed the MUSC study on DHA which would be the end of the year. Now back to the school. His school schedule was changed to try and minimize the number of teachers he would have to interact with during his normal day. For reasons never fully explained to us he would no longer have any instruction from Mrs L. Instead he would be moved to Mrs. C's classroom for most of the morning lessons and then would spend most of the afternoon with the Mrs. T, a Special Educator, at the school. Her environment was very small 1 to 2 other students. From day 1 in Mrs. T.'s environment, it never seemed to work well. On the Tuesday, before the last week of school before Christmas break, I was called and asked to come pick him up he is suspended for 3 days for hitting Mrs T in the face. My wife picked him up the day before and spoke directly with Mrs. T, who told her when she tried to do hand over hand prompting with him after an initial refusal he it her in the neck.. no mention of completing a disciplinary form or intent to request suspension was even mentioned or eluded to. Yet, here the next day I am called and told he is suspended for 3 days (Wed, Thurs, & Fri) because of that incident. I was livid, why was I not told the day of the incident, why waste a day? Why was this not conveyed the to my wife when she picked him up the day before. I received some lame excuses about it being late, near the end of the school-day and time was a factor. I guess I feel somethings are important to work a little late for. That night I tried contacting our advocate, who is difficult to get a hold of, with no luck. I read through the student handbook and found something that I thought, based on my interpretation, was against the rules for them to suspend him. Well, it was my mis-interpretation so my efforts to get him in the school the next day were rebuffed. I did contact Dr. G the next day and we had a lengthy conversation on the phone where the ambiguous policy in the manual was explained to me. Although I still disagreed, because why suspend a student, which could be interpreted as a reward (at least by a student who thinks and interprets things differently than others) consequences should be made evident at the time of negative behavior, not 20 hours later! Because, if the number of days on suspension nears 10, the student cannot be suspended anymore until a meeting is held between all the concerned parties, so it begs the question what does the school do with the child until that meeting is concluded. Anyway, after very lengthy discussion with the Dr, I was able to convince her to call the principal on our son's behalf and allow him to at least attend his class's Christmas party, since socialization is such an important and critical aspect of countering Autism. We were able to get this done for him. I was thrilled if for no other reason that the principal told me the suspension WOULD stand. After the first of the year we started trying the medication. The results was like night and day. His energy level remained the same, everything seemed to be the same, except for aggressive behavior. The first 3 weeks back at school, no aggressive tendencies were reported. We had a few instances of pushing or tapping, but they were noted to be of a non-aggressive nature. We were ecstatic. Then the fourth week. A case of hitting, then a second second case. All were the results of someone else hitting him. We began stressing to him that he should raise his hand and inform the teacher. The third case he admitted to hitting back, but after raising his hand to tell the teacher. Now today, suspension for a day for hitting a student in the face at recess who tugged on the back of his jacket. I am still gathering some of the details regarding this newest instance. Some more backfill of information. We have also changed providers for his ABA therapy services at home. We are more than thrilled with how different things have been since. More consistent visits form the therapy coordinator/lead (we are talking weekly here). No missed visits from the line therapist. We have added sessions with a speech therapist from the same provider. All work TOGETHER. Communication is better. Tracking therapy tasks, goals, progress, techniques updated almost daily. Progress... phenomenal! The contact the school, to discuss how to coordinate techniques for homework, receive feedback on his efforts during class, his progress, his behavior. The let the school know how they are working to minimize his negative behaviors and offer suggestions to them. I said communication is better; no, it is GREAT! We do see progress in him, we see him growing, we see him trying. I keep reminding myself how challenging this must be for him.